The last few days I've received a number of e-mails from concerned listeners that go something like this.

Hey A-Hole! Stop scaring people by saying the sequester means budget cuts. It's just a cut of THE INCREASE in spending.

I would like to respond to those e-mailers by first thanking them for showing me much respect when they used the traditional Italian greeting to your superiors of Hey A Hole. Next let's talk about this cut of the increase in spending. Last August the President signed the Sequestration Trancperacy Act that was sponsored by Republican Jeb Hernsarling. Jeb was concerned that American's wouldn't know what was coming. 

“The American people deserve to know how their commander-in-chief intends to implement half a trillion dollars in cuts to our national security which his own Secretary of Defense compared to 'shooting ourselves in the head.'"

So that's why we got the layout. And it's more than just Defense cuts. I agree with Republican's who say the President is trying to scare American's so they'll demand we avoid the sequester. I disagree with Republican's who say it won't be a big deal. Yes I've heard the cry 'it's only 85 billion out of a 3.8 trillion budget'! But wait! The CBO says it's even less! It's just 44 billion this fiscal year. So we're freaking out over cutting the equivalent of cutting $440 bucks out of $38,000? Hell families do that all the time! You don't even have to cut cable to make that work. Make some sandwiches and you'll cover the difference!

Except we already spent the $38,000. Like you had told your mom "don't worry about being evicted from the nursing home because it costs $38,000 a year and I've got just enough to cover you. And the year is half over. The fiscal year ends Sept 30th. So we are exactly 6 months in on Friday. Which means you paid $19,000 already and owe 19 grand more. But you only have $18,540 left. And then some crazy law got passed that said you can't get a 2nd job. You can't borrow it. And the really crazy part of the law you aren't even allowed to cut off the cable or make sandwiches or do anything else to save that money. By law you have to tell your mom the last week or so of the year she has to get out of the nursing home. Merry Christmas Ma!

That's how the sequester works. Like we learned earlier in the week from the guy who suggested the sequester to Obama, Gene Sperling; The intent was to secure the commitment of both sides to future negotiation by means of an enforcement mechanism that would be unpalatable to Republicans and Democrats alike. In less fancy talk it has to make everyone miserable or it won't work. That's why departments have to make across the board cuts, rather than cuts to their dept. It's designed to be masochistic so only a sadist would let it happen. Pulp Fiction fans may recognize Zed as our Congress and Zed has announced it's time to bring out the gimp. By the way we're gimp and the party starts this Friday night. 

photo: Screen grab Pulp Fiction

We don't look so good do we? Because our government has cut a deal with themselves where we all take it straight up ...well it won't be very pleasant is all I'm saying. That's why I disagreed with Congressman Mulvaney, who said it will hardly be noticeable and agreed with Congressman Wilson who made another speech on the floor today warning us of the dangers of allowing the sequestration to take effect.  

Joe speaks with all the passion of a GPS device. But he is smart and he is right. Cutting 44 billion a year out of our bloated budget should be so easy even a Senator can do it.

But they had 18 months to do it the right way and failed, so now.... Hold on tight because I can hear them saying "bring in the gimp".